In the absense of a flower

[Lilly]

Lonely...

The sky shone a brilliant blue, hardly a cloud disrupting the open, never ending feeling of the abyss above. Almost silently, a bleached female made her way through the slight powder of snow blanketing the ground. The air was chilly, a mere ten degrees Fahrenheit. But for a wolf, the chilly air did not bother her. With a coat as thick as hers, as many are, she preferred it on the colder side. Anything-above 50 and she would overheat. He coat was a brilliant white, almost blending with the snow below her delicate paws. Silent paw prints made their way across the snow strewn valley towards the end of what seemed the never ending valley. Maybe near the tree line, or just inside of the thick, distant forest she would find what she was looking for, what she had been waiting for. It seemed like forever. She had been waiting her whole life to find it.

What Lilly searched so longingly for was love. She had dreamed of the feeling, of knowing in your heart that this guy, this man was perfect for you, understood you. You could be you, without judgment, without fear or rejection. This was so important for her, to look forward and somehow believe that somewhere she would find that one male who could love her for who she was, and love only her. The thought that she finally may be able to meet him finally made her walk faster. She wanted to reach that tree line, to find her night in shining armor. Yes, Lilly is only five. But, for one, it is normal for wolves to find mates at an early age, and two, she doesn’t want to wait. Why wait if you can have it now? Lilly isn’t comfortable around other wolves. She can’t be herself. It is pretty sad how shy she actually is, and it only adds to the deep desire of wanting to find a man who she felt accepted her for her, who loved her for being Lilly. When she was around other females, she didn’t talk all that much, wanting them to like her, to be their friend, but consciously knowing that they found her boring. When males came around, this brought her to a whole new level. She would freeze, panic, laugh worriedly trying to act normal, to act cool, but it wouldn’t work. She would talk and her voice would shake, dreading the rejection she knew would come. Embarrassed, she would leave, and it would only add to her self loathing and her loneliness.

And that is why she came here. She crossed the valley whose air is so thick with fog and smoke, breathing is nearly impossible. The grass grows so tall she could barely see, and the sounds that echoed through… it made shivers run down her spine. But, Lilly crossed it. She wanted to see if the myth was true, that the brave wolves who dare cross the valley can live in peace. She wanted a new life, to start over and try not to make a fool of herself to anyone who crossed her path. It was her only chance of finding a guy, of finding love. So, she walked right up to the edge of the forest, daring to step into the shaded darkness between the large, daunting trees. Her paws made a slight crunch in the snow as she cautiously looked around, waiting for someone to appear.

Waiting

{crappy post. Sorry.}

[Tuk]

All this feels strange and untrue
And I won't waste a minute without you
My bones ache, my skin feels cold
And I'm getting so tired and so old

Large paws melted the packed snow that adorned the earth like an angelic mantle. Snow was everywhere, reflecting cold off the surface of the earth. Tuk felt glad for his thick pelt that protected him against the chill, allowing him comfort in the face of biting cold. His own mountain had adapted winter's garment, becoming frigid in the season with an increasingly sparse amount of game. Tumulosus was now crowned in snow, donning a white cape that was slung across the tops of tall trees whose evergreen leaves poked out in defiance of winter. Despite the sullen blanket of death, life still stirred beneath the cover, trembling in the forms of elk and snowshoe hares that roamed the lands. In caves, giant bears slumbered in secrecy, the only sound emerging from their havens being the terrifying groans that emerged from yawning mouths. They stirred every now and then, their energy shifting through the patterns of the world so that a ripple could be discerned. Then they fell back into the peace of their quiet, invisible within the dark voids of their hibernation. Tuk’s nose was met with dead air, only a few vague scents rising to meet his flared nostrils while his ears heard only the single heartbeat that was produced by his own organ interrupt the silence. Everything was muffled by the white cover, enveloped in a case of quiet that could not be broken. Even the howls of wolves could not pierce the glassy calm, only riding on the edges of the muffled sounds until the melodies died somewhere in the burdened branches of trees that supported drifts of snow. Tuk's ears had difficulty capturing the stretched howls of the wolves in different regions, the sounds exiting the various terrains as if they were being strangled by the falling snow. The sounds were dampened by the ice crystals; the sticky snow grasped and clung to the drifting howls until the vaunted chords were yanked back to their origin. Silence reigned the winter season, interrupted only by the most piercing of bird songs that managed to conquer the smothering hush.

The silence had spread to Tuk, filling him with a profound solitude that was absolute. It had been growing for some time now, reaching through the surface of soil to spread leaves and beautiful buds of a poisonous flower. The loneliness was keen within, like a pronounced pang of hunger that gnaws at the heart until one can barely breathe for the sensation of it. The stillness surrounding him was oppressive in its strength, bearing down on him with fierce strength until he felt as if he were restrained to a cage. His home had become his cage, keeping him from the knowledge of the outside world. He had become claustrophobic, desperate to escape the cold clasp that the mountain held him in. He needed freedom, he needed noise, and he needed someone with whom he could share his acquired home. Wolves were rarely solitary creatures, living alone in the comfort of their isolation. His soul begged for family, for other wolves that might come enter his terrain and cause the patterns to leap and embrace their admission. The winter was imploding within him, driving him to madness so that he knew that soon, his unbroken quiet would remain forever as such, without any creature that might coerce him into parting his maw in speech. He required company; his heart was crying with the curse of loneliness he currently endured. No longer could he maintain this pretense of comfort, wrapped in his own supreme silence. He needed some sort of havoc to cross his terrain, or else that poisonous flower that blossomed within would spread insanity to his mind.

If one did not have better knowledge of Tuk's character, an observer might have felt that he was tentative as he crept between the trees, broad paws etching prints into the snow as the white substance shifted and sank beneath his warmth. Instead, Tuk was testing the earth, seeking the life that thrummed delicately beneath the oppressive blanket that had been cast across it. He could sense it, barely, hovering near death in wait of spring's delight. Many plants clung to life, dormant in this stage of seasons as they bore the weight of cold. The life was soft and fleeting within, as fragile as a butterfly's wings as it takes flight in the air. His breath emerged from nostrils, clinging to the air in the form of visible vapors. He looked like a dark beast from the pages of some legend, yellow eyes as piercing as an arrow’s head. They appeared as if they could look right through something with ultimate wisdom and glimpse the truth that burned beneath the falsity of the exterior. They were the orbs of a predator, sharp lanterns that could define prey and tear it apart in the same moment. His black phase pelt was sharp in contrast to the innocent hues of white that surrounded him, the deceptive coat of winter donning his mountain home. Carefully, the wolf cut a pattern in the snow that twined through the thick forest of his mountain as he descended, agile limbs easily traversing the treacherous terrain. His past was carried like a burden, subject to the silence that continued to rule the inner workings of thought. He was bound by the chains of that quiet, slipped into the leather sheath of the sword so that the brilliant shine was masked by dulled brown. He wanted to escape; he lusted for the noise of civilization and company. Images of his past played through his mind, quietly existing beneath the hooded lashes, but loud in their force as they urged him onward. They were mysterious, not to be revealed for they had no purpose in being revealed except for the purpose of reminding Tuk that once, he had been part of a pack. Once, he had known the touch of love and felt the warm tongue of his mother. In the same manner, he had felt the teeth of opponents and their hot breath upon his smoky black throat, captured the loud snarls as two beasts far gone in the passion of battle circled one another, blood painting their story upon the ground. He felt the patterns always shifting beneath his paws, the power surging at the touch of many wolves that raced across the winter pastures and dug claws into the fading lives of prey. He felt it all, and that made him feel every moment that had passed beneath his secretive eyes, his acquired knowledge sitting with cold presence in a passionless mind. The grinning face of some wolf he did not know sat there in his thoughts, humor dancing in eyes that were as yellow as the sun. The wolf laughed at him in silence, laughed at the observations the fool wolf had made. Yes, Tuk saw himself there in the uncomfortable haven of his mind, that face foreign to his own eyes, but recognized all the same as its empty laughter echoed through his mind.

Limbs wound their way through the stretches of Tumulosus, quickly arriving at the base where a forest loomed before him. Tuk entered without hesitation, slipping like a black phantom through the mystery of the trees that whispered and gossiped about him. He heard their tales as they sighed and swayed beneath the weight of winter, creaking every now in then as they succumbed to their age. Their was no breath of wind on the floor where Tuk trotted, paws swinging with increased speed as he twisted between the legs of tree trunks that stood so solidly embedded in the earth. Silvald possessed the stench of a new owner, obvious to Tuk the moment he had crossed the distinct scent barrier that defined the separation between his terra and the terra of this new wolf’s. His senses were acutely alert, sensitive to every snapped twig and rustled bough that only made the silence more obvious. Tuk’s attention was momentarily drawn to the nearly inaudible crunch of a rabbit’s feet. He heard the pause between leaps as it bounded cautiously over the earth, then heard it pause, the heartbeat increasing in speed as it became aware of Tuk’s presence. He passed the hare without offering it any attention, not permitting himself to chase it as he might under different circumstances. For now, he had a distinct goal in mind, swirling through the patterns of his thoughts until it consumed all else. He could not cast off the blanket of quiet that had been unwontedly placed upon him until he achieved this particular goal, and he was intent on arriving at its success. Anything to relieve this severe seclusion would be beneficial. He was desperate, the deep cut of yearning spreading through his veins until all was focused on the escape. He hoped to find that escape as soon as he emerged from the dense grouping of trees that formed this forest. He knew it must be there, lurking somewhere in the depths of some other wolf, some wolf that might allow his form to approach so that they might interact.

Like night, he stole over the earth, the forest thinning in thickness until the lands of claiming loomed before him. His pace increased in intensity, paws digging into the earth with renewed vigor so that he nearly leapt over the earth, muscles surging invisibly beneath a raven pelt tinged in silver. The Haunted Valley loomed in the distance, the swirling fogs swallowing everything as mystery was scrawled into the depths of mist that prowled over the terrain. He slowed in pace until he stood like stone, eyes intent on the mist, anticipatory as if it might spit some form of life from its belly. Even his fur was not moved by the wind, and he appeared as if a spirit with fog that had escaped from the Haunted Valley swirling about his paws. He blinked once, yellow lanterns extinguished for a brief moment before they were ignited again in life. They attempted to penetrate the fog, at last rewarded when they defined the form of a female that was barely noticed against the backdrop of grey and white. Her coat was brilliant, shimmering with angelic quality that was vaguely determined from the snow. She looked as if she had perhaps been born of the snow, a spirit that had dropped from the clouds with a coat made of ice crystals. He was transfixed by her image, awed at the form that wandered with a pride that had been deadened by some sort of ambiguous emptiness that was attached to her figure. She was positively captivating, and to eyes that had not witnessed another wolf in a long time, only heard the howls of distant families as they asserted their harmony, she was like a goddess. She transcended everything surrounding him, pacing upon the fluffy substance of the muffled snow as if she strutted upon dreams. Yet there was something about her, drifting like an unanswered question, something that kept her eyes shifting nervously about as if at any time she expected something to leap out at her. He felt a sadness blossom within at that thought, immediately captivated by this quality that made her not just another wolf, but an individual gem amongst many. He approached with caution, pressing his paws into the earth with as much force as he dared to produce a noise for her to capture. A twig protruded through the ground, struggling to emerge from the depths of winter. He stepped on it with force, crushing the hopes of the single piece of wood with ease so that the female might have something by which to associate the direction of his presence. His yellow eyes were subdued, carefully meek so that she would not find his dark presence so… intimidating.

He tested his tongue, trying to break the course of silence he had followed for so long. He found that tongue could circulate, lift, and tumble so that words could be identified. Strings in his voice box were tested, the humming of life strung through them until speech was formed and restrained just beyond the cage of his thoughts, ready to emerge and break free into the repressive air. Lips moved with caution, cracking open as ivory incisors were glimpsed and the pink expanse of the tongue could be seen just beyond the bars of the teeth. He spoke, music lifted by his speaking faculties until the knowledge of speech returned to him, and he was satisfied that he remembered the mechanics of lyrics. “Hello.” His voice was like soft thunder rumbling far in the distance, playing through the dark clouds of a storm just before it dissipated into the semblance of a lamb’s meek bleating. If one could have defined his raven lips from the sea of fur that coated his figure, they might have determined that they were curved in a slight smile, eyes almost shyly peering at the female’s features as if he were interacting with another for the first time. He had cast off the barriers of age, returned to the image of a pup that timidly quests for food. Yet he was no timid wolf, merely allowing the mask to cover him for the time being so that this female would not be put off by his lanky presence. There was time enough later for her to discover his other side, the one that was dark and alluring, husky in voice and sweet in song. For now, he just had that slight smile playing on his lips, yellow eyes peering from the black void he created in contrast to the snow. “My name is Tuk. I hail from the mountain in the distance, Tumulosus.” He nodded in the direction of his mountain home as if that were enough to define it in its transcendence; slowly emerging from the pressing cocoon of quiet he had dwelled in for so long. At last, he was emerging, and he could not jump from it all at once, but must do so slowly, with caution, or else he would break the fine webbing that kept him cozy against the shock of the outside world. “Who are you, if you don’t mind me asking?” He was sweet. His lyrics were like candy, hungrily devoured by those lucky enough to hear them. He was producing them for this femme, hopeful that perhaps she would share words with him, and, in doing so, the valuable diamond of her name. He was anxious to hear her title so that he could place her, could know the special distinction that defined her even further from other wolves. No matter what it was, it would be beautiful because it was her, because she was the name that enveloped her. So he waited with utmost diligence, rounded auds pricked attentively in her direction like a dutiful male that had at last located company to shatter the solitude he had suffered for so long.

[Lilly]

Cold. It was everywhere with the approaching winter. It wove its fingers around the very bones of Lilly’s body, creeping into the spaces between the vertebrae in her spine. Cold snow spread across the ground like an icy blanket, suffocating all life beneath it. The fog that still hung in the haunted valley formed cold ice that would make its way to your ears, head, back, and the back of your neck carried by the subtle, cold breeze. The slivers of ice were so small that they would find their way to your skin as you waited at the forest’s edge, sending shivers through one’s body to even the toughest of wolves. Yes, cold was everywhere. It hung in the air, causing her hot, steamy breath to rise before her eyes. Grey clouds drifted overhead, blocking the sun from shimmering down it’s warmth to the world. It was a cold that you could not escape, a cold that hung in every detail of the world around you. The grey clouds overhead gave an eerie feel, spreading the coldness that didn’t just appear as temperature now. They were bleak, and with the combination of the fog and these clouds, Lilly was turned away by their non-homely feel. Cold… The trees before her swayed their bare arms, creaking their cold greetings, shuddering at the second wave of the cold, icy breeze. Lilly turned her head to the right, staring at a large oak who whistled an uncanny sound with the now busy wind. Its arm-like structures grasped out towards her unpleasantly. She turned her head slowly, watching the other black branches grope for the direction for which she stood, moving their creepy branches in offensive ways. Even they were cold, unwelcoming.

She would be run out again. It was fate, and she knew it. History was bound to repeat itself, as it always does. Once is never good enough, a wolf has to be shown up, or accused many times in a life for the ‘almighty’ to be happy. The branches in front of her creaked again as a particularly strong gust of wind blew past. Lilly could just imagine some large wolf, playing with his chess pieces below on earth, laughing wickedly when he caused mass terror or destruction. She was just part of his little game… She watched the branches and she couldn’t help but to be afraid. The sky was turning darker, colder. Everything around her reminded her of her past, the unpleasant memories and feelings that haunted her mind everywhere she went. Lilly drew in a shaky breath, breaking her head away from the threatening trees and turning to the valley that lay behind her. The thick fog rose up, and created shadows that appeared to move like haunted beasts, or anything terribly scary for that matter. And with this even more terrifying image, she closed her eyes and whimpered. ‘It’s ok Lilly. You’re going to be fine. Nothing is going to get you, or cut you up into a million pieces and us it as confetti. It’s only the storm that’s coming and that really, spooky, rotten fog that should die. But it’s not going to hurt you. Just calm down. Get a grip.’ She repeated words of comfort to herself in her head, but the reminiscence of her past came flooding in. Large wolves were surrounding her, closing in. She was trapped, the cliff standing tall behind her, beasts leaving no room for her to leave. Laughs and shouts flooded into her brain. A voice in the distance called for the beasts to do it, to just get the pregnant dog.

Lilly opened her eyes. No, she would not relive that, not again. It was bad enough that she had to face that unpleasant hell in her dreams. She wouldn’t be brought to reliving it while she was awake. She glanced around her, trying to steady her breath and remind herself that it was only the wind. And that’s when the large, black wolf came into her vision. He was standing their, watching her like he’d been their for quite some time. Lilly couldn’t breath. Her airway had been blocked by something big and wasn’t giving in. Her eyes were wide, and focused on the strange wolf in front of her. Who was he? Appalling, imaginary thoughts formed in her head about who this wolf might be. The memories of her past experiences still lingered in her head and she couldn’t help but suspect that he was up to no good. Lilly couldn’t blink, she couldn’t look away. She saw his eyes drilling into hers, and could only guess what he might be thinking. Was he actually here to do something to her? She was conscious of the fog and the twisted branches on her sides, but she couldn’t care about them anymore. Her feet were frozen to the ground beneath her, and no matter how much she wanted to move, to maybe run somewhere safe, she couldn’t motivate her body enough to unglue herself from this spot. ‘Lilly, how do you know that he’s some cyco-killer? Didn’t you come here to start a new life, to find a herd and a man to love? Someone who accepted you and you could completely trust?’ But no matter what she told herself, she couldn’t bring that creeping suspicion that he was just like the other male’s she’d met. And that thought, well, it downright terrified her.

“Hello. My name is Tuk. I hail from the mountain in the distance, Tumulosus. Who are you, if you don’t mind me asking?” His low, husky voice rang out into the chilly air, calm and soothing. Her fear began to ebb away in his presence, being replaced by an awkward nervousness. He didn’t seem like he was out to rape or do other unspeakable thing to her. He was just here to, meet her. Lilly got a better look of him, now that he was closer. She found him attractive, in that tall, I-have-deep-dark-secrets kind of way that she had always had a soft spot for. Probably because she had them too, and she felt that she could relate. And, these kind of wolves had never hurt her. Sure, some had lashed out a few times, but it was nothing compared to what the others had done… Her eyes relaxed somewhat, and she managed to take in a shaky breath. Yes, he was pretty, and yes, he seemed nice, but could she trust him? Could she be sure he wasn’t going to turn on her once she let her guard down? Oh she wanted to trust him. She wanted to impress him and be everything he wanted, but the fact remained that she the answer was still no. She couldn’t trust him. And, she couldn’t be everything he would want in a female. She was a skittish, cowardly female that had an embarrassing shyness problem that prevented her from talking normally to strangers. And he, Tuk, was this handsome, seemingly perfect male who could protect you, and who all the females would die for. She had no chance.

Looking from his eyes to the ground, she took in another shaky breath. “Um-, hi.” She quickly looked at him before looking back to the ground. “My name’s Lilly.” She spoke quietly, words tumbling out of her mouth in a quickened, rather shaky pace. She took in another deep, insecure breath, glancing up at him to see his reaction. ‘Shoot. There I go again, making a complete fool of myself to the wrong people. Why can’t I talk? Talking isn’t all that hard. I have no use to hope that he’ll stick around for very much longer.’ She was completely flustered and embarrassed. Biting her lip she looked to the ground. To some degree, she just wanted him to leave, so she wouldn’t have to be embarrassed, or embarrass herself in front of him anymore. But then again, she so desperately wanted him to stay, already having put some sliver of trust and hope in him. She liked him, and as far as being afraid for your life goes, he had taken that fear away. But, she didn’t want to be hurt; she didn’t want to be rejected. Lilly glanced up at the black male again, seeing that he was still there. ‘But hey, look at the bright side. He’s not blowing me off, or attacking me…

yet…’

[Tuk]

I hold you in cupped hands
And shield you from a storm
Where only some dumb idiot
Would let you go

They were both trapped within the lusty song of winter, ensnared within the cold embrace of a world that was slowly thrashing through the throes of death. The motions of fatality were upon the earth, flaying it into submission before spring might come and nudge it into a bright burst of vivacity once more. A few flakes began to cascade from the sky, pouring from birthing clouds until crystals fluttered on the deadened breeze of the season. The two wolves stood, both seeming to have sprouted roots that delved deep through snow to reach soil so that they found they could no longer shift. They were locked in a stifling trance, oblivious to all else except for the muffled sounds of winter that were nearly agitating in their dull tranquility. The cold was coming like an exhalation of lungs, the breath spread eagerly across the land until all became frozen beneath its touch. The world was transformed, decked in the scenes of a winter wonderland, both appealing and terrifying in the same moment. Creatures that had been taught since birth to fear it were scurrying to make arrangements that might sustain them through the frigid winter months. Yet a world encased in fluffy cotton and muffled by the constant spilling of crystals was attractive in appearance. The gentle drifting of delicately composed flakes could be considered beautiful, alluring to the eye when caught beneath valiant rays of golden sunshine that managed to pierce the grey coverlet of clouds. The silence could be comforting when it was not stifling in existence, lulling and calm so that those who were so firmly weaved within its lies might drift into endless slumber. The quiet was so inviting, enticing; coaxing those who paced through its gossamer threads to ease and submit to the clinging cold. Yet there it was, that desperate clutch of arctic air, seeking life that it might grasp in the wild chaos of destruction. It crept on stealthy paws through the land, beguiling in appearance until those who were so transfixed by its complex façade were breathlessly swept beneath the concept of time until they decomposed into the land from which they had emerged. One might not notice the slinking cold that approached, skulking in the shadows with patience until there came a moment of weakness in which it could pounce upon the unsuspecting victim. Icy enamels of death would be sunk into a jugular that throbbed with ebbing life, that sleepy victim succumbing with an empty sigh as the steady pounding of the heart faded into silence. The weather prowled about them with twitching tail, eyes boring into figures that were secreted with unfulfilled questions. Would this figure collapse before winter’s grin? Would that creature succumb to the pressing silence and die a lonely death? Would those unsuspecting beasts become weak before spring’s airy caress, and die vainly at the claws of some creature that embodied the season in that moment? Only the steady, silently shifting hands of the clock of life would determine these unanswered questions as winter looked on in avarice. Silence and tension were the only responses as the claws of winter sank firmly in the earth, spring looking on nervously at creatures that pleaded for her ginger touch.

The two wolves stood there, facing one another, the grinning faces of their demons reflected within the surfaces of their orbs. Tuk nearly wondered if he had somehow invaded someone’s dream, the arctic femme before him was so immaculate in appearance. She appeared as if she were not formed from reality, but rather shaped by the mechanisms of fantasy and set to roam the world in ethereality. She was born of winter, birthed from the very flakes that swirled about their figures and sought to dig icy fingers past fur and into skin. There were secrets in their eyes, glimmers of darkness that flashed with scintillations. The fear was emanated from her, as strong as the feminine scent that pervaded her body. He observed as the panic developed upon her maw, expressed in the widening of orbs as she discerned his existence, growing and strengthening before she was able to ensnare it within chains and thrust it away into a hidden niche of horrors that she grasped furtively within her mind. In her eyes, Tuk saw himself reflected, and the sensation that raced to spark shivers scattering through his body was unpleasantly unnerving. He shifted upon embedded paws, maw lowering toward the earth, canines well hidden beneath the black cover of lips, and lids fluttering lower over the bright shine of eyes until he had adapted an image of deference. He would not submit before anyone, but he knew no good would come of looming over this female as if he were some beast filled with winter insanity and prepared to fall upon her as prey. True, winter had saturated his spirit, filling him with the conflict of silence until he was drowning in the muffled echoes that rebound from footsteps upon the snow, but it had not yet conquered his mind. His mouth could continue to form coherent speech and his eyes could easily discern those before him as they now investigated this spooked female. Winter had not yet allowed his mystery to swallow the bearer of secrets, and he existed plainly now, only filled with the slight discomfiture that follows the shattered result of a long period of silence. The bright, piercing yellow lanterns followed her movements as her eyes shifted in anxiety, searching for an available exit; his auds unable to hear the rapid beating of her heart, yet still able to sense the muscle as it clenched and released with haste within her chest. She was nervous, to the point of being startled by any proffered movement he might have made. The eyes were inherently distrusting, watching him with such wariness that he entertained the idea that he was mistaken for some murderer seeking game. He was no such murderer. Well, at least now he was not.

The wolf diverted her gaze from his, as if unable to meet the intense sight of his orbs. He allowed his lids to flutter over them, quieting the color that was striking against his silver-tinged coat for a moment before they flashed open once more. He was observing, cautiously, waiting for the cues that would direct him in interacting with this female. They were subtle, but they were there, locked within the furtive glances and the yearning intent that was mixed with terror within her eyes. A growl threatened in his throat in response to the terror, vibrating across the chords of speech, but he silenced it before the undulations of sound could emerge from his maw. He was nearly offended that she did not trust him more, but the real reason the emotion was rising nearly to emerge in speech was due to the hatred directed at whatever had sparked this fear within her. What could have caused such fear? They were wolves, for God’s sake. You know, those animals at the top of the food chain that could easily shred a small animal should they so desire? Very little could threaten them except other wolves, and this concept Tuk knew very well. A strong urge to protect her rose within him along with the lust to destroy and gleefully shred whatever had crossed her path in such a traumatic manner, but he contained himself to passivity, carefully seating himself upon his haunches so that he appeared even less imposing. Instead of a growl, he permitted a whine to rise within him, an encouraging sound that was barely audible against the pressure of the cotton sea of white surrounding him. “Um-, hi.” His tail thumped across the earth twice in dog-fashion in response, rounded ears swiveling atop his skull to better capture the melody of her song. She offered him another clandestine glance that was perhaps not meant to be noted before her eyes again slipped to focus intently upon the ground. His breath was snagged within his lungs in anticipation of his next words, hooded eyes intently devouring her features and hanging upon the lyrics that dripped from rolling tongue. “My name’s Lilly.” Lilly. The name echoed within his mind, resounding across the walls of his skull. And it fit. It fit her perfectly, like a lacy glove slipped over slender fingers and onto an elegant hand. Lilly. It was her: the delicate curl of petals, the gentle inhalation of sweet, tantalizing scents, the pale embodiment of beauty. He lifted himself upon all four legs once more, weight resting evenly upon his paws as he lowered his neck between his shoulders. Eyes were always analyzing, seeking something that perhaps was invisible, but there. Something indiscernible, yet unbearably captivating. He stepped forward a few paces, tail lowered so that she would know he meant no harm. He simply had to move, had to break this growing tension she was unknowingly weaving between them. He saw the fear growing in her eyes, and he sought to bat it away as he might a cobweb that separated them from each other. He observed as she grew flustered, her precarious imbalance in the situation spiking so that her anxiety became a tangible string between them. He broke it with lyrics that wrapped around the frail twine and separated it with ease. “Lilly.” The two spoken syllables were spoken with intensity as his paws carried him forward. He paced gently, silently, as if he were striding upon unsteady ice that might fracture beneath him and send him flying into an insufferable abyss. He circled around her once, coming to rest beside her with enough distance between them so as to not be unsettling, but close enough to tear at this barrier she was unknowingly attempting to build between them. His maw twisted toward one of her exposed ears, eyes never wavering from her vision so as to be wary that she might spook from him at any moment. “Has anyone ever told you that you’re beautiful?” The words were a soft rumble, a gruff whisper that was alluring in texture. “Because you are very, very beautiful.” His tongue tested its boundaries, manners pressing at the edges of their newly birthed relationship so that he teased at something beyond mere amity. He was being reckless, but that was part of what made him so… attractive, if one might describe it as such. He danced away from her then, releasing the pressure he had placed, now permitting her to impart her own move upon this newly formed binding. With patience and deference, he awaited her reaction, a playful tinge sparking within his hooded eyes that was hardly detectable within the golden depths.

ooc: Um, yeah. I think I need to edit this later, but it's up there. For the sake of being up there.

[Lilly]

Rabbits. Everyone likes a good rabbit. They’re soft, fuzzy, and for such a small animal, they carry quite a bit of good, tasty meat to them. It is a fact that rabbits are good at anything they do. They are just plain, good. Never had Lilly met a wolf that didn’t enjoy a rabbit once in a while as a snack. It has become a fact in her mind that it is physically impossible to hate rabbits. Not only are they soft and tasty, but rabbits blend in quite well to their surroundings. They move at a decently fast pace, and produce offspring rather quickly. There are so many rabbits that you can find them everywhere you go. If you’re hungry, grab a rabbit, no matter the color. It’s the perfect combination. They are the tasty snack that everyone likes, and seem to drop randomly from the sky no matter your location. Rabbits… How could she be more like a rabbit? Ok, it’s a very odd question, but one she thought of all the same. Everyone loves rabbits, and she wants to be liked by all. Of course being eaten, or having such a short life expectancy and having to hide all the time because of all the wolves out trying to eat you wouldn’t be fun. But that’s not what she was thinking of, she was thinking of the popularity of rabbits. Being so popular would be a change. Having decent friends would be a change. Being loved would be a change. And these changes are all what Lilly wanted, especially the last one. To be loved. So why could she be more like the rabbits that are so loved? But, of course, the number one reason why rabbits are so loved is because of their edibility, and as far as she knew, no one wanted to eat her. So really, she shouldn’t be looking to the rabbits for her answers at how to change. It is actually quite sad that she had to resort to comparing herself to them.

But, the fact of the matter is that Lilly knew the different ways in which wolves act. She observes and can tell what they would like or not like. She knows if they are happy or sad, or if something would be funny… Ok, this is getting sad. I realize. Of course she can tell if a wolf is happy or sad or if something is funny. So why can’t she jump in with confidence and make something of herself? Lilly is observant because she distances herself so much. She distances herself because of what happened, and because of what happened, she can’t trust anyone, therefore the distancing. It makes a nice happy circle of denial and fear doesn’t it? Not only can she not trust anyone, but her dreams had been shattered. The dream had seemed so childish anyway, with all the pink and unicorns and princes that see you for who you are without you having to open up to them first, and who sweep you off your feet and never break your heart. It’s just what it is, a dream. Nothing could come of it, and it would never come true, so she would have to move on. What was the point in holding on to something that gave you false hope?


There was a large wolf standing in front of her, his eyes drilling holes into her scull. He is the one who she wanted to impress, but she couldn’t get up the nerve to just, trust him. Who was he anyway? A wolf from some mountain Tumulosus… Well that wasn’t very descriptive. That mountain could be… well anything. But what did she expect? Tuk to spill his whole life out to her in one breath, though they’ve barely met? How smart would that be? Lilly probably wouldn’t even believe him if he had. Tuk was watching her every move. She felt like she couldn’t breath without him analyzing how she did it, inspecting to see if she was good enough. Lilly kept looking to the ground, fixing her eyes on a pretty uninteresting pebble sitting a few feet from her. But her ears were pointed towards the brute, every particle in her body listening. ‘Lilly.’ His handsome, deep voice spoke her name, and she couldn’t help but feel shivers run down her spine. Lilly’s eyes shot up immediately, watching the brute intently as he decided if her name was worthy enough. His front right paw moved from the ground, and that instant, her heart stopped. Her breath was caught in her throat. What was he doing? His paw returned to the ground and her heart rate shot up and her breath quickened. She watched him step closer, and closer, pace unwavering towards her. Her left hind found solid ground behind her as she took a step back, but the rest of her body wouldn’t move. She wouldn’t let it move. Be like the rabbits!... Wait, what? But Lilly didn’t have time to think of how stupid what she just thought would sound, because he was watching her with those intimidating eyes of his, passing by her side and coming around her rear. Sugar. She watched him, trying to gather herself together. He wasn’t going to hurt her. All he was doing was trying to flirt with her, and harmless flirting doesn’t lead to attacking. He wanted her to flirt back, and if she ever wanted to make something better of herself, she’d have to flirt back. But her heart still pounded quite heavily in her chest as she watched him watch her. The last thing she felt she could do at this moment was flirt, although somewhere in the back of her mind, there was a tiny sliver of a desire to do so. ‘Has anyone ever told you that you’re beautiful? Because you are very, very beautiful.’ Lilly took a sharp intake of breath. Did he just call her beautiful? No one had called her beautiful sense-… sense they had-… Memories of her departure from her last pack flooded her memory, and she immediately took several steps backwards, eyes wildly moving around. “Yes.”

She took in a deep, shaky breath, fixing her eyes upon the brute trying to control herself. Great, now she had pushed him away. She had to try and fix that. He would leave if she didn’t start acting normal. Wolves tend to frown down upon being crazy… “I- I mean no.” Her eyes immediately returned to the ground. “Just please don’t say that” And now Lilly wasn’t making any sense. He probably did think she was crazy by now, but there was nothing she could do about it. The words had already slipped from her mouth. She had already pushed him away. Geeze, why can’t I just flirt?! It’s not that hard, really! I don’t have to hyperventilate every time I hear something similar to what they-… they-… yeah. Lilly looked back up at him in an almost pleading look, though she tried to conceal it. She hoped desperately he would give her one more chance not to make a fool of herself. He really was handsome. The way his hair ruffled on his head, and his deep eyes. When she looked at him, and could let go of everything, Lilly felt as if she could just melt. All she needed was for him to come back, and ‘make another move’ towards her. At least she would try not to screw it up again.



{mift. crappy. but done. xD}